A wagon load of wit and wisdom mined from various sources.
This is a collection of my favorite quotations, one liners, puns
and points to ponder (some call them "sentence sermons").
"I've noticed that everyone who is for abortion has already been born." - Ronald Reagan
"Is your Christianity ancient history or current events?"
"Integrity is doing the right thing, even when no one is watching." - C. S. Lewis
"Choices are the hinges of destiny. Destiny is not a matter of chance; it's a matter of choice!"
"Faith is taking the first step even when you don't see the whole staircase." - MLK Jr.
"Fight all your battles on your knees and you will win everytime."
"The argument for the risen Christ is the living Christian."
"A bad attitude is like a flat tire - until you change it, you're not going anywhere." - Denzel Washington
"Patience is the ability to keep your motor idling when you feel like stripping the gears."
"Man's laws cannot make moral what God has declared immoral."
"It's not the load you carry; it's how you carry the load."
"It's kind of fun to do the impossible." - Walt Disney
"Tea Kettles sing even when they're up to their noses in hot water."
"Aspire to inspire before you expire."
"Adversity is God's university!"
"Failure should be our teacher not our undertaker."
"Life without God is like an unsharpened pencil - no point."
"God feeds the birds but He doesn't throw the food into their nests."
"He who never makes mistakes never makes much of anything."
"The cross is the only ladder that reaches heaven."
"The measure of life is not its duration, but its donation. How much will you be missed?"
"We set the sail, God makes the wind."
"Few men have the virtue to withstand the highest bidder." - George Washington
"Worry is the dark room where negatives are developed."
"Christians are like teabags--they're not good for much until they're in hot water."
"Laughter is life's shock absorber."
Epitaph on a tombstone: "worried, hurried, burried!"
Eulogy at funeral: "Fred only went to church three times in his whole life...
When he was hatched, when he was matched and now that he's dispatched."
"Life is a ratrace and the rats are winning."
"The secret to success is to start from scratch and keep scratching."
"He who throws dirt loses ground."
"Tact is the art of making a point without making an enemy."
"Peace is not the absence of conflict; peace is the presence of God in the midst of the conflict."
"Never be afraid to trust an unknown future to a known God." - Corrie Ten Boom
"Plan ahead: it wasn't raining when Noah built the ark."
"Don't be afraid to go out on a limb...that's where the fruit is!"
"Don't lose hope, remember, Moses was a basket case once."
"The rapture will be the real separation of church and state."
"Make all you can, save all you can, give all you can."
- John Wesley
"Where you go hereafter depends on what you go after here."
"No one can make you feel inferior without your consent."
- Eleanor Roosevelt
"Take care of your life and God will take care of your death."
- George Whitefield
"If I take care of my character, my reputation will take care of itself." - D.L. Moody
"Integrity is being willing to give your personal diary to the town gossip."
"Work as if everything depends on you, and pray as if everything depends on God."
"Attempt great things for God and expect great things from God." - William Carey
"Prayer moves the hand that moves the world." - John Wallace
"Faith sees the invisible, believes the incredible and receives the impossible."
"A ship in the harbor is safe, but that's not what ships are made for."
"I know God promised not to place on us more than we can bear, but sometimes I wonder why God has so much confidence in me." - Mother Theresa
"Some people sow wild oats all week then show up at church on Sunday to pray for crop failure."
"Forbidden fruit creates many jams."
"The best vitamin for a Christian is B1."
"Anyone can hold the helm when the sea is calm."
"Unless you do something beyond what you've already mastered, you'll never grow."
"Everything that can be invented already has been..." - U.S. Patent office, 1899
"Fear keeps you up all night, but faith makes a fine pillow."
"Noah was a brave man to sail in a wooden boat with two termites and two woodpeckers."
"Always use the word impossible with the greatest of caution." - Wenher Von Braun
"You'll always miss 100% of the shots you don't take."
"The sea is a dangerous place and its storms terrible,
but these obstacles have never been sufficient reason to remain ashore." - Ferdinand Magellan, explorer
"Labor to keep alive in your breast that little spark of celestial fire called conscience." - George Washington
"I have been driven many times to my knees by the overwhelming conviction that I had nowhere else to go."
- Abraham Lincoln
"Your teeth may be false, but let your tongue be true."
"Revivals don't last! Neither does a bath, but it sure helps." - Billy Sunday
"The key to marriage is the key to automobiles...stick with one model." - Henry Ford
"Hot heads and cold hearts never solve anything." - Billy Graham
"A clear conscience is a continuous Christmas." - Benjamin Franklin
"God governs in the affairs of men." - Benjamin Franklin
"I tremble for my country when I remember God is just and that His justice cannot sleep forever."
- Thomas Jefferson
"A happy family is an early heaven."
"Love reduces friction to a fraction."
"Faults are thick where love is thin."
"A hypocrite is a person who isn't himself on Sundays."
"He who dies with the most toys, still dies."
"Worry is a futile thing, much like a rocking chair,
although it occupies your time, it doesn't get you anywhere."
"Today is the tomorrow you worried about yesterday."
"Blessed is the man who is too busy to worry by day and too tired to worry by night."
Don't be afraid of tomorrow...for God is already there."
"There is nothing that wastes the body like worry, and one who has any faith in God should be ashamed to worry about anything whatsoever." - Mohatma Ghandi
"Worry doesn't empty tomorrow of its sorrow; it robs today of its strength and joy." - Corrie Ten Boom
"Give God what is right, not what is left!"
"If the grass looks greener on the other side of the fence, their water bill is probably higher."
"If you really want to do something, you'll find a way; if you don't, you'll find an excuse."
"Despite the high cost of living, it's still quite popular."
"If you don't know where you're going, you could wind up someplace else." - Yogi Bearra
"Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, but TODAY is a gift from God."
"Bitterness is like drinking poison and hoping the other person will drop dead!"
"Some people's minds are like concrete-thoroughly mixed up and permanently set."
"1 cross + 3 nails = 4 given!"
"Don't wait for six strong men to take you to church."
"A smile is the most inexpensive way to improve your looks."
"Triumph is the "umph" added to try."
"Without the Bread of Life...you're toast!"
"Success comes in cans, failure comes in can'ts."
"Fear makes the wolf bigger than he is."
"God doesn't call the qualified, He qualifies the called."
"A ship in the harbor is safe, but that's not what ships are made for."
"A man without a wife is like half a pair of sissors--incomplete and disfunctional." -Benjamin Franklin
"Love sees through a telescope, criticism sees through a microscope."